Real Housewives of New York star Sai de Silva recently shared her thoughts on the end of her marriage and the difficult new chapter ahead following her separation. In an interview with PEOPLE, Sai discussed how being vulnerable during her time on RHONY helped her approach her personal struggles differently.

"I wish I could tell you that I am fine and I'm great and I'm pushing on," Sai said. "But I think that being vulnerable this season taught me a lot about opening up." For Sai, vulnerability used to be seen as a weakness, but now she considers it a strength. She credits her experience on RHONY for helping her shift her perspective.

Sai's decision to end her marriage wasn't caused by one specific incident, but rather a culmination of things that left her feeling increasingly disconnected. "I just felt very lonely in my marriage," she explained. "What I realized is if you're not watering the seed, it's not going to grow."

Both Sai and her husband played a role in the deterioration of their relationship, according to Sai. "He's not only to blame, but so am I. We were no longer maintaining that marriage on both sides." Eventually, Sai reached a point where she no longer believed the marriage could be repaired. "I have nothing left. I'm tired," she admitted.

One of the main factors in her decision was the impact on her children. Sai says she realized they were beginning to notice that she wasn't happy. "I think my children were beginning to see that I wasn't at my happiest," she says, adding that she believes she had made the decision internally "months before this came out."

As a mother, Sai wants her teenage daughter to understand that staying in an unhappy relationship isn't necessarily the healthiest choice. "Kids are very perceptive. They can see when something's not right," she explains. "She deserves to see her parents happy." Sai is committed to keeping her children safe and protected from any potential fallout from the divorce.

Despite the end of their marriage, Sai has no interest in publicly speaking negatively about her ex. " they're kids," she says. "We just keep them as safe as possible." Sai doesn't want her children to see her criticizing their father while simultaneously telling them that they come first. "What kind of person or mother would I be if I'm bashing him and then my teenage daughter is seeing this?"

Sai also acknowledges that she and her husband have grown apart over time. "Marriage, if you don't grow together, you grow apart, and a lot of things have grown apart between us." As for whether she handled her divorce situation the right way, Sai remains focused on moving forward and prioritizing her family's well-being.

In reflecting on her journey, Sai recognizes that she's undergone significant personal growth since being on RHONY. "I'm not the same person I was when I was 28 years old and I'm sure he's not either," she says. For Sai, vulnerability has become a key aspect of her personal development, allowing her to confront challenges head-on and find strength in openness.

As Sai navigates this new chapter in her life, she continues to prioritize her family's happiness and well-being above all else. With a renewed sense of purpose and determination, Sai de Silva is ready to face whatever comes next.